funniest toxic things to say

Im not an astronomer but I am pretty sure the earth revolves around the sun and not you. Im choosing to ignore you. That is where most accidents happen. I never even listen when you tell them. I actually liked that one though. Don't worry, I wasn't offended. 30 Funny YouTube Videos to Watch During Your Lunch Break, Funny Responses to "How Are You?" What would I do without you and our deep conversations? You are so full of crap, the toilets jealous. Jinkx Monsoon. Lists. A little jovial selfdeprecation robs a foe of thier ability to verbally spar. Why arent shorts half the price of pants? Thats where most accidents happen. Im listening. Do yourself a favor and ignore anyone who tells you to be yourself. Check your lipstick before you come for me. Naomi Smalls, If you want anything said, ask a man. Worry about your eyebrows. How many licks until I get to the interesting part of this conversation? Everyone talks about the early birds good luck, but what about the early worms bad luck? The gap in between your teeth look like parking slots. The truth will set you free. I would prefer a battle of wits, but you appear unarmed. You must be tired because youve been walking through my mind all day. Too bad you cant Photoshop your ugly personality. We headed over to Twitter to find the "toxic traits" people have aired out on their accounts. What do boyfriends and mascara have in common? This funny discord TTS message has got you covered to have a good laugh. Oh, so you fainted from the excitement of getting a text from me? This expression is used most often by males who think that a womans appearance is worth more to her than respect for her intelligence and autonomy. Whoever told you to be yourself gave you really bad advice. I consider you something a vulture would eat. Good job. When karma comes back to punch you in the face, I want to be there in case it needs help. 345 other terms for toxic- words and phrases with similar meaning. "You're useless." 28. Here are some hilarious one-liners and funny quotes to toss into your conversations. If you feel manic or you feel depressed on a particular day, its okay to acknowledge that. I like you just the way you are: uninspiring, uninteresting, and dreadfully unfunny. "Grow a pair." 23. Im just smarter than you. Maybe eat makeup so you will be pretty on the inside. And just so you know, maybe should eat paint maybe it will acaully make a beauful image on the inside. Its no less insulting or mean-spirited than if you were to use a slur to directly attack someone who identifies as homosexual. ' Bianca Del Rio. We were happily married for one month, but unfortunately, weve been married for 10 years. I may love to shop but I will never buy your bull. 17. Your poor mama didn't have no choice. Youre the whole royal family. Dont you get tired of putting makeup on your two faces every morning? I'm so glad we have brown cows, otherwise there wouldn't be any chocolate milk. I would talk to you while looking at you, but its ambarissing to even look at you because your being an idiot. It'll give you a chance to see if they can take it as well as they can dish it out. Youre the reason I prefer animals to people. You are a pizza burn on the roof of the worlds mouth. I found it in my business. Large and in charge isnt your excuse to be a fat asshole. If you want to write something more unique before Happy Valentines Day, here are some cheesy lines. I wish I had a flip phone, so I could slam it shut on this conversation. I love that our easygoing friendship fits perfectly with my laziness. If you're going to be two-faced, at least make one pretty. It just takes me a moment to process so much stupid information all at once. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk around a few more times? Please just tell me you dont plan to home-school your kids. Cultural references to movies and TV shows can be extra hilarious ways to respond when someone doesnt text back. Log in. I just googled Funny things to write in a text. I'm straighter than the pole your mom dances on. You can probably think of a list of hurtful words and phrases that have become the go-to expressions of people youve met. If you dont like me, acquire some taste. To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. Your breath is the reason for climate change. If you want to shut someone down when they start to get mean, you need to use one of these perfect comebacks: If you want to get the last word into an argument, you need to use these great jokes: Dont hold yourself back from saying what youre thinking. Yet even we introverts will sometimes refer to ourselves as antisocial when describing our behavior at social gatherings or our level of social energy at a particular moment. I dont know what your problem is, but Im guessing its hard to pronounce. Take your parents, for instance. I still have mine. Wow, your maker really didnt waste time giving you a personality, huh? nouns. Someday youll go far. I'm not a proctologist, but I know an asshole when I see one. You look like something I would draw with my left hand. If you ever cross my mind, Ill make sure its a busy intersection. Humor is scientifically proven to make you seem more sexually desirable, more intelligent, and more physically attractive. Why can't you just do it my way?" Neither does it make sense to call someone a success based on successes that dont ultimately define them. Not at all gross, today. 3. #6: "Sorry You Feel that Way. I suggest you do a little soul searching. There is just no satisfaction in telling someone how terrible they are, when they agree and then proceed to beat you anyway. Check out this actionable guide on How to Be Funny: 7 Easy Steps to Improve Your Humor. They both run at the first sign of emotion. Bad idea in your case. Introverts know this, and so do those who know them. Using emojis like , or to make sure your friends know that youre messing around. 61 Most Savage Roasts And Jokes List That Will Shut - Humoropedia.com Whats understood doesnt need to be explained. You should really come with a warning label. You're so ugly that your mom said, "whos baby is that..?" Until then, Im glad we have each other. Then please vote on your favorite roast below because your opinion matters. I was going to make a joke about your life, but I see life beat me to the punch. Youre not pretty enough to have such an ugly personality. Instead of doing that, we could just give the other person the benefit of the doubt and kindly offer them a brief summary of the story behind the point were trying to make. Toxic (song): "Toxic" is a song recorded by American singer Britney Spears, for her fourth studio album In the Zone (2003). You hit the nail right on the head. The Definitive Guide to Facial Expressions, Funny Things to Say on a Valentine's Card, Funny Things to Say When Someone Doesn't Text Back, Random Things to Say and Weird Things to Say, Key Takeaways: Make People Laugh by Saying Funny Things. Get a good chuckle out of random telemarketing calls by surprising them with one of these ridiculous responses. 180 Best Insults to Destroy Your Enemies | Thought Catalog Related: Why People Are So Mean And How To Deal With Them. A woman passing by remarks: If you were any sort of a gentleman, youd lift your hat to a lady. He replies: If you were any sort of a sexy lady, the hat would lift by itself., Whenever your ex says youll never find someone like me, the answer to that is: Thats the point.. Your crazy is showing. Whats the best holiday present? "What's it like to be a failure?" 21. Here are some of the most-liked, and RUTHLESS, comments: 1 . In this ultimate toolbox, youll learn the most essential skills to developing self-improvement. Oh, you dont like being treated the way you treat me? You're so fat when you ate at KFC the waiter served you the bucket on the roof. They say our brains dont stop developing until we reach 25; looks like yours stopped a bit early. You look so good I want to plant you and grow a whole field of yall. When I see your face, theres not a thing that I would change except the direction I was walking in. Light travels faster than sound. You have so many gaps in your teeth it looks like your tongue is in jail. Do you remember the first time you bought a bottle of wine for me? Isnt there a bullet somewhere you could be jumping in front of? I might be crazy, but crazy is better than stupid. Im not always hungry; sometimes Im sleepy, too. Toxic synonyms - 345 Words and Phrases for Toxic - Power Thesaurus These insults are going to convince others to stop treating you so poorly: These are the best insults to use on anyone who gets on your nerves: Use these quotes to put your enemies in their place: January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. Some people hatch into beautiful butterflies. There are so many paths in life. I respect the opinion of everyone who agrees with me. 18 Fun Things to do in Kansas City in March - msn.com Youre the reason the divorce rate is so high. Id choose your company over pizza anytime. No, you want something witty, something to cut them to their core. Using this insult essentially means you see the other persons value as synonymous with their usefulness to you. Youre about as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle. Im not a nerd. It releases oxytocin, which can trigger all sorts of bonding responses in the human body. You might just find one. You do things that other people consider anal, paranoid, or ridiculous because you cannot NOT do them. Follow-up phrases include Im sorry you were offended by that, or Im sorry, but neither of which qualify as a genuine apology. I've never heard that particular insult before. For that matter, why do we ever use hurtful words to describe someone? I know you got my last text because Cops doesnt start till 4. Try these funny comments with your friends. Mister Rogers would be disappointed with you. Your face is fine but you have to put a bag over that personality. You can like for things to be perfectly in order and not be OCD. There are so, so many comments from young women who have been hurt and who have found a way to hurt back. Its your chance to pounce. Gen Z Girls Share The Most 'Toxic' Things To Say To Boys During a Fight Let Me Buy You a Nice Cup of Get Over It.". When someone says to you ur so retarted say oh sorry i didnt hear you i thought you were describing yourself, when someone says u cant even roast me back say OMG REALLY I DIDNT KNOW I COULD BURN TRASH, when someone is saying there so cool and they were also mean say to them god stop being delusianol ur not cool u think your freinds are saying things like omg he is such a legend u really think they are trust worthy, I called a pest exterminator, to exterminate you cause u look like trash. The assumption behind this statement is that the other person is overreacting to something or that the other person just loves drama or wants attention. 50 Hurtful Insults For Your Ex When you Just Need To Be Mean - GLOW UP LIFE Youre like a cloud. If someone never fails, it probably means theyre not doing enough. 12. "It's all in your head." 26. Isnt it dangerous to use your whole vocabulary in one sentence? For your B-day, I wanted to give you something that was funny and charming, but then I remembered you already have me in your life. Allow me to be the first one. you're IQ is the reason humans arnt on mars yet. And its worth the effort: Laughter is scientifically proven to bring people together, make you more likable, and help people feel more comfortable opening up. So, get ready to say goodbye to the brutally cold St. Louis winter and give spring a huge warm welcome with one or more of these fantastically fun things to do in March 2023! Jun 8, 2019 - Explore Victoria Nguyen's board "Roblox and funny quotes" on Pinterest. My phone battery lasts longer than your relationships. If you have a problem with me, write the problem on a piece of paper, fold it, and shove it up your ass. Your the reason god created the middle finger, You're entitled to your incorrect opinion, You should really take a trip to hell, and take your parents with you, if i was you ide donate myself to a thrift store because thats where cheep crap goess, sorry my internet is slow but atleast im happy its not as slow as your brain, Was you born on a highway?

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funniest toxic things to say